“Tolerations” – the background noise that begs eradication! Thursday, Oct 7 2010

What was that I need to handle?

The recent posts has been about helping ourselves feel good.  There are things in our lives that are like radio static that can have an unsettling feeling – coaches call them “tolerations”. 

 Tolerations are something I work to clear in my own life as well as with clients.  These are the persistent things running in the background of your mind that need doing yet you forget about them until they show their little face.  They are the things you mean to get to yet seem elusive.  One of the ways to identify them is to notice the voices in your head as you go throughout your days.  How often do the same things keep coming up?  

 Tolerations can be any of the following things: 

• A persistent squeak in your car that you only remember when you are driving down the road. 
• A windshield wiper that needs replacing and you only remember when it rains
• A missing button on a favorite suit that you forget about until you go to wear it – again!
• A dripping faucet that you only notice when you can’t fall asleep
• A “serious” conversation you need to have with someone yet you keep putting it off
• Always being late to meet a specific person and you chastise yourself every time
• Overdue books, movies, phone calls, appointments
• Not planning your day and ending up doing every one else’s priorities- on a regular basis
• Not doing the important things first and ending up with all urgent things
• Something you need to return to a friend

  

 What are some of the things you tolerate? 

What purpose does this toleration have in your life? 

What are the benefits of not having them? 

How will being rid of the toleration make a difference in your life? 

 Unlike a habit or a ritual, these are things that can be turned around pretty quickly –It is important to remove them from your life because they do drain energy and steal your focus.  They can interfere with your joy and ability to reach your desired goals.   

Commit to take action  on them now!  Let me know how eliminating them feels for you! 

Thank you for reading this mini-series on ways to improve how you feel about you and your life! 

Kathy

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Empowerment for Women…Article 1 Thursday, Aug 5 2010

Empowerment  for Women – Article 1

A colleague and I were talking this morning about empowering women to live their life authentically.  We have been working on a series to help women discover, open and empower themselves through the key areas of greatest concern. In today’s discussion we talked about the things that we can do to help our “tribe” in the areas of our passions.  My journey has invoked strong passions regarding empowerment.

 One side of this story told below is after the power has been “lost”; the other is the evolving process of moving into your power. It is transitioning into authenticity where nothing has been lost or given up, but there is the desire to be fully self-expressed. The tools are similar; the experiences differ.

 One is not born a woman, one becomes one” – Simone de Beauvoir

Background and how “power outages” can occur –

Because women are such great care givers, it often translates to yielding who you are to the tasks of life, business, and relationship.  Women have been known to frequently surrender who they are, to put others needs before their own, to give way in order to feel acceptance, to please, to avoid stepping on toes and to protect themselves.  The effects over time of such behaviors can leave women empty shells unable to give without further depletion.  It happens over time without notice until something stirs within, a life altering event occurs or something causes an awakening.

 Society fortunately has favorably altered their viewpoint of women; business has changed to accept with welcoming relief women in increasing numbers at the highest levels.  The glass ceiling has been shattered significantly.  More choices mean entering careers later in life to have family first or flexible hours to accommodate the changing dynamics of the generations. There are more places to shine our light and be who we are created to be, yet I still see increasing numbers of women at all age levels, in various careers and “roles” diminished.  Sometimes it is because of these very opportunities and the dedication it takes to remain in these positions that causes a loss of ones true self in the process.  Delicate balance and life management is vital.

 Becoming Authentic and Symptoms of “Power Outage” -

It is easier to know that you are still evolving and moving into your state of authenticity with awareness and focus, but how do you know if you are the “frog in the pot”?

Symptoms - The women who “fall under this spell” are the ones who look in the mirror and no longer recognize the face before them.  Their audaciousness, vivacity, humor, and lightness is replaced with worn, tired, and vacuous eyes. They may find themselves passed over for promotion instead of getting what they want because they “surrendered” when it was not required.  They may experience chaos regarding their next career choice and they may just be “tired of it all” and want to start over!  They may be victims to their own choices not knowing they can make a different decision.  And through no obvious intent on their part, they may find themselves someplace they never thought they could end up.

“So often I have listened to everyone else’s truth and tried to make it mine.  Now, I am listening deep inside for my own voice, and I am softly, yet firmly, speaking my truth” - Liane Cordes 

I know what it is like to be in your fullest power and to fall to the lowest ebb and dive to places that seemed beyond rising.  And because women are resilient beings we come back stronger, vibrant beings with sirens blaring because we can!

 In our seminar series and our corporate programs we provide tools and processes to integrate into your life to either regain your power or prevent its loss and grow into your authenticity, to retain your vitality, embrace your inner power, stay rejuvenated, take risks, and live life fully.

Thank you for reading – more to come this topic!

Kathy

Summertime Sass Series for Women

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“Do one thing every day that scares you” – Eleanor Roosevelt Monday, Mar 1 2010

“Do one thing every day that scares you” – Eleanor Roosevelt

 Have you ever wondered what would happen if you decided to take a step into thin air?  Does the idea scare you? Do you believe a stepping stone will appear?

Courage to go after what you want frequently requires such action.  Whether you decide to take a leap or a stride, the idea is to consider what might make you want to do anything.  What burning desire within remains unfulfilled?  Ready to move on it?

 You don’t have to do this journey alone.  Join me! 

I have set a few targets I want to reach that require I take leaps that raise my heart rate and make the hairs on my arms stand on end.  They are small steps that feel like a leap to me.  I plan to do other things that don’t increase adrenaline – they are the things that will open my mind to think in a new way, to look at things from a different perspective.  By doing both the hair raising things and the low adrenaline items I expect to expand my brain and alter some of my neural pathways.  I intend to experience unexpected delights, personal and professional growth!

For example, today when I did my morning walk I reversed my route. I was surprised at what I saw.  I even walked on the other side of the street and encountered different people engaging in their morning routines.  I noticed how the quality and direction of the sunlight changed the landscape. I thought less and observed more.  And it was fun!

 “Man’s mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions” – Oliver Wendell Holmes

I took a leap last week and walked into a place I hadn’t been before and made a declaration about myself and my business that surprised me, yet it was true.  What followed was a series of steps to get me in front of a “decision maker” and all the way to their office without an appointment. I did get to put my head in the door and smile. It was a good beginning.  I later learned that the first gate keeper usually barricades all entry and I made it through three.  Something changed when I made my additional declaration. I empowered myself.

 What’s a leap for you? 

 Whether you want a new job, have a dream to start your own business, desire a promotion, have an innovative idea to change things in your organization, or want to start all over again doing something that fuels your passions; it all begins with one step.  Think about one action you can take now and go for it.  (Dare to expand your “limits”!)

 A not so hair raising thing to try –

A fun exercise is to pretend you are an alien on this planet and walk through the world you inhabit, notice the things you habitually do and challenge yourself to think about them differently.  Ask yourself why do this?  Why do I do it this way?  Do I like this?  How does it make me feel?  Move your furniture around; change the orientation of your desk (if you can), dress differently.  Park in a new spot; talk to someone new; ask a different morning question; give a new greeting.  Smile a lot!

March is the beginning of the end of the first quarter and this message is about how to keep the flow in your 2010 intentions.  It’s an idea that can deliver extraordinary results if you are willing to risk shaking up your world a bit to get what you want. Step out into the air and watch the earth beneath you carry you on your way.

 …”Strong convictions precede great actions.” – J. F. Clarke

 Happy March 1^st!

Kathy

Want to learn more about exploring ideas?

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Change Your Thoughts – Change Your World! Tuesday, Feb 23 2010

Change Your Thoughts – Change Your World!

Can you see with new eyes?

The biggest examples in our lives on ways to see things differently are frequently children.  They are limitless in their imaginations and have no boundaries on their thinking.  It is only after exposure to the world through the eyes of an adult that they begin to narrow their perspectives.  This begins the process for the beliefs they take on that shape their decisions and their life. We’ve all been there! Fortunately quantum science is now helping all of us lift the ceiling on what is possible!  So the following is a bit of how we can begin now to see with a new set of eyes.

 Cycles and Patterns – How often do situations in your business or your life seem to repeat themselves? Many times we face the same scenarios in our personal and business life and wonder what it will take to move us to a new level of productivity or effectiveness towards our desired goals. 

 Change Your Thoughts! – New revelations in neuroscience are demonstrating the need to change our thought patterns.  It is even important to notice how we think about our thoughts.  This introduction of awareness combined with new thoughts can begin to help you move through barriers or obstacles.  Awareness of what is also coming out of our sub-conscious is critical to this whole process.  It is said that 85% or more of what takes place in our life comes from the “unconscious” beliefs that automatically run our world.  That’s where the work begins…

 Begin – One action item you can take today is to find just one area that isn’t working and seems to continue to circle around and look at all of your ways of thinking about that issue or situation.  I even recommend writing down all the ways you see it and then begin to imagine what it would be like to have a different result.  Vision it with as much detail as possible and as many emotions as it takes to experience it as real.

 These thought changes serve to help in accomplishing what we want in our business or our personal life.  I have personally seen with clients as well as in my own life how effective just changing one thought and opening up to a new perspective can begin to change the results you seek.  It’s a good practice to hold that new thought for a minimum of 30 days to begin to change the neural pathways and let the new road lead you.

 Resources – There are hundreds of resources on U-tube, a multitude of books and audio programs to help with this process.  A couple of good places to start would be “Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain” by Sharon Begley, “The Biology of Belief” by Dr. Bruce Lipton and “Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life” by Dr. Wayne Dyer.  

 A revelation – It recently “sank in” that what makes something happen is coming from the place of it being true.  What this means is to “stand” in this place and “look out” with new eyes and get that it is possible!  Once you have the new outcome in mind you can begin to construct new thought processes. 

Change your actions – Follow that with different actions to deliver this result.  It’s fun to look at things from a new perspective and often can cause an “aha moment” or a great burst of laughter as we see a new way to look at an old problem!  Let me know how this works for you. 

 Enjoy your day! Invite a smile…

Kathy

More About What I Do – for You!

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Removing Blocks to Momentum… Tuesday, Feb 16 2010

As I stated in my introductory blog, this “rave” can take many directions and today’s blog will offer both practical things and eerie science!

Removing Blocks to Momentum…

Have you ever wondered why you seem to keep repeating some of the patterns in your life that keep you from moving forward? Has something in your business been at a standstill for some time?

It is often obvious to others in our world what is preventing forward momentum whether in a business or a personal context. Ask anyone when you are stuck and they will offer insights that can be very telling and often disturbing. We wonder how these things elude us and it is usually many different things.

What I offer here is that sometimes we are too close to something to see it any other way; sometimes we are resistant, either blatantly or unconsciously and lastly we may have old filters or old beliefs that are running the show.

Science – It is a proven scientific fact that we have neural pathways that form with the respective patterns and actions that we have taken in our life and we are “addicted” to them. (For an interesting take on this, I invite you to rent “What the Bleep Do We Know – Down the Rabbit Hole” and after watching it once; watch the two hour section that focuses specifically on the visionaries and scientist interviews that have brief segments throughout the movie portion. I think you will discover some reasons it is hard to break through our blocks.)

These patterns in our brain actually have chemical responses that “trick” us into believing it is not possible to move through the obstacle or make a new choice. We have “conditioned” and automatic responses. Breaking out of blocks we put in our own way or that we unconsciously create offer the same challenge to break as someone who is trying to quit smoking or break a sugar addiction. We have triggers that want to keep us on the old path and it is so familiar that we stay that course instead of breaking free.

Businesses will experience similar blocks and have cycles of repetition where they seem to be unable to move out of patterns that stifle their growth. People run businesses and often find the familiar easier than creating and affecting change. The good news is that everything can be unblocked. It takes effort and persistence and once you begin to see the results it will encourage you to keep going and tackle the next block.

Solutions – Awareness is usually the first tool for solving what is blocking your view. Deciding that you want to know is another crucial step and the last one is the willingness to do something about it. As you become aware, and decide you want to do something about it, choose what you want the new results to look like, and begin to tackle the block! Create action steps and invite support from your team. Stay focused on the outcome and soon – no more blocks! One at a time they will disappear.

Resource – Norman Doidge, author of The Brain That Changes Itself offers relief and encouragement both in his book and in this video. Here you can get a small insight into the new science backed by evidence as to what we can change with what we now know.

Thanks for reading!
Kathy
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